effective mosquitoes, flannel sheets and kid germs…..

being sick in and of itself just plain sucks.....being sick while trying to sleep in a humid room while kicking yourself for not changing the flannel sheets sucks even more......OH WAIT!...being sick and overheating on flannel sheets while swatting mosquitoes is just plain OBNOXIOUS!! Luckily I'm an insomniac....so now I'm up and I can kill those buggers face to face...while sick and overheating....

….so why not write? right?......WHAT!!!!?....are you kidding me?!!....... ok…being sick and overheating on flannel sheets while swatting mosquitoes AND a big noisy fly is pretty much breaking point!! 

Hello 1:29 a.m. …..for the safety of myself and the fly I need to vent onto the page in a long diatribe about sickness… flannel sheets in summer weather…. mosquitoes…. and noisy big ass flies…

1. sickness: whenever I’m sick I can’t help but think about the kids…. yes, the kids…. and not in a ‘OH NO now I’m going to be less of a mom’ kinda way…. nope…. it actually suddenly dawns on me in a complete moment of ‘aha!’…. “holy shit they did feel like crap!”…. that moment when you feel their pain… their stuffy head and runny nose…. their slightly swollen glands and phlegmy throat….. WHOA… wait a minute…. phlegm?.... who the hell knows how to spell that off the top of their head?.. and if like me you can’t… good luck sounding it out…. there is just so much going on phonetically!!! …ok…. anyhoo… ya…. that moment I realize I probably shouldn’t have finished their virus infected dinner attempting not be wasteful…. or maybe ‘kiss torture’ should not have been on the agenda during those critical days when the small humans were contagious…. ya…sickness…. that’s what I think… sniff sniff cough… I will be more aware in the future…
2. flannel sheets in summer weather: um…. ya…. epic fail on that front!! ...and I’d like to say this was the first time this has happened…. I really would… but the honest truth is every year I am faced with the same crappy night’s sleep prompting me to change the sheets…. in fact from this day forward it will be called “SCREAMING HEAT FLANNEL SHEET” night…. an annual event!....nice….. and it’s not like I can wake Farmer Luke from his restful (albeit mosquito interrupted) sleep to….um…. change the sheets…. now can I?....risk that… you don’t wake a sleeping farmer…at least not mine. So after tossing and turning, sweating and sticking, swatting and cursing and dreaming of various ways to cool down (would Farmer Luke notice if there was a sopping wet cold towel next to him?…. do I go and steal one of the children’s fans #whydidntigetours? #wtf? ....hmmm I bet the wood floor is cold…) …the thing that sucks the most is that you don’t want to be uncovered (hence potentially cooled down) for fear of the mosquitoes that are just waiting for warm steamy flesh to be exposed….. ARGH!!!!!!!!!! ..... in the end I simply gave up and here I am dreading the moment I need to get back into that bed with my already feverish body and inevitably have to meditate through the heat…ugh……
3. mosquitoes: ahhhhhhhh the quintessential icon of a Canadian summer in the country… when that small window of cool spring sunny days allowing for endless unbridled outdoor activities breaks and the onslaught of swatting and itching begins… that time when the world of bug spray and citronella steps onto the stage… as I lay in bed endlessly swatting at the air in hopes of killing the buzzing in my ears I can’t help but think of a saying I heard from a very brief… very inspiring... and very influential meeting last summer…. the saying is “if you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in bed with a mosquito”….DAMN RIGHT!!! Interestingly this was said by a man who ran unassisted across Canada raising money for children’s hospitals…. Mr. Jamie McDonald. One night last July Farmer Luke brought him home after passing him running on our road near dusk… always willing to help someone out we happily took Jamie in for the night and fed and watered him…. what an amazing AMAZING man…. incidentally he began this run after cycling 14,000 miles from Bangkok to his hometown in Gloucester, England AND gaining the world static cycling record pedaling straight for 268 hours…. yup, I’m exhausted just writing this… and this guy just happened to run by our farm and needed a safe place to crash…. um, ok!?!… from that day forward we followed him as he continued to run UNASSISTED across Canada from summer to winter finally making it to the western coast just after February ~ AH-MAZE-ing!!! …that’s one mosquito I’m happy to say has passed through my life… check out our addition to his documentary (10 mins and 22 secs in....there we are) and I HIGHLY recommend watching more of his videos as he's really funny and... well...  Canadians rock and their hospitality is astounding!!… bet you get hooked… wow I just managed to turn an annoying encounter with a mosquito into an uplifting and inspiring moment…huh.
4. big ass noisy fly: …um….sorry….he didn’t make it.

2:13 a.m…..well that killed a few minutes…..now I’m still sick…. only slightly overheated and cooling down….. and the mosquitoes seem to be feasting on the humans upstairs and the fly is…well…gone…. huh…wonder what’s on the food network?                 

night night